(06.07) Guru's Grace - Varahi Virya Nandita

Amba Devi - Amaravati

Amaravati: Full of Ambrosia: This is probably the 3rd time I am hearing this name from the depths of my conscience. I am somehow associated with this name because I have never heard of it, till my conscience made me aware. Some research on Google revealed these facts.

According to the Hindu belief – ‘Amaravati is the capital city in the Celestial Kingdom of Swarga’, located on the Eastern spur of the Meru mountain. It is said to have a thousand gates and believed to have fruits of all seasons, jewels and other objects of pleasure. Temperature does not exist nor does qualities like  Depression or sadness.  The lovely Apsaras add to the beauty of this city. It is said to be the land of Indra’s heaven. It is the land of fallen warrior heroes or those who performed penance and sacrifice. The name means ‘Full of Ambrosia’ -. Courtesy – Book – ‘Dictionary of Ancient Deities’.

Ekvira Devi - Amaravati

It was just before I woke up one morning: I saw the beautiful face of a Goddess and heard the word ‘Amaravati’ several times. Google search for ‘Goddess Amaravati’ gave me some interesting hits. I found 2 very ancient goddesses – Amba Devi & Ekvira Devi in Maharashtra- They are worshiped just as a face in their respective temples and are an avatara of Shakti. Their temples have been constructed in the early 1600s and are still functional. For more details of these temples visit: 

http://amravati.gov.in/htmldocs/ambadevi.htm

This also interesting had a story of Krishna in the background It is believed that Krisha eloped with his lover and sought Amba Devi's blessings at this temple here in Amaravati!

Contact with Divinity Hearing anklets during broad day light has been the awareness of Divinity this month. My office serves as a Swami Room. As i sit rattling away on my computer on a project I am working on, I heard anklets for the longest time one day and a for a brief few minutes with my sister in the room as well on another day! We couldnt help wonder where the sound came from?

Another interesting phenomena with my soul exhibiting ‘All pervasiveness’ is having a dialogue in different languages.  While i know Hindi, and can read /write, I dont talk to anyone in Hindi at home. During meditation at night, as I retire to bed, I have heard dialogues in Hindi, felt I understood the whole thing, however when i woke up had no memory of it. Or while asking for some question of my conscience would get words from the sentence that made perfect sense during the night but would be a puzzle the next morning, because i would have no memory of the dialogue. Using a word or 2 that i remember, I would try to trace back the events of meditation but have not had much luck. Since I feel a strong connection to Pulipani siddhar, one night as I was going to sleep I asked for guidance of my Gurus and the Siddhars. One way to know they are with me is seeing a lot of violet light. I was once asking the Siddhars, especially Pulipani Siddhar how he managed to live in society? How did his worship of the Divine in 'Form' lead him to realize the formless aspect of creation? I also asked how he worshiped the Divine Mother? I recevied an answer, one that I couldnt remember very well.  I was getting pretty delirious in my sleep and felt like i tried very hard to remember things with my mind, but it felt like my tongue was slipping and so was my consciousness. The next morning when I woke up, my consciousness brought up words such as ‘banned’, ‘discriminated’ making me wonder why I would say such things in my sleep? or Who would say them to me? more importantly in what context? 

Thoughts crystallized in Water - Image courtesy - Internet

Thoughts materialize into Karma: Birthing thoughts and birthing children are the same: As you sow so shall you reap!  They grow and grow and you get attached to them. Baba always reminds me that I need to observe all the thoughts - make no judgement of them being good or bad - meaning I need to become more inclusive of everything around me -  I should not allow judgement to attach myself to certain thoughts and reject the others: offer all of them at his feet & caution -- Hold on to none of them! For when we hold on to thoughts we give them power to materialize into action - Karma! Thoughts are very powerful entities, one which we cannot take lightly. 
At the beginning of this month Baba has been asking me to be very stringent with my thoughts. He had told me to analyze every thought and diligently surrender to him all of them, especially the ones I felt were even remotely petty. Its been a pretty excruciating process because one becomes extremely conscious of words uttered and thoughts that pass. I have also been  given by Baba several opportunities to concentrate into nothing and do mantra japam of the wonderful Panchadasi mantra at ease. Every time i have felt a bout of internal quietude, i have immediately done mantra japam irrespective of the noise in the external environment at great ease. Something i struggled with last month, but am able to do without any effort this month! A great stride from my Being without any effort on my part as an Ego. All i do differently: is look at everything more with an attitude of Surrender than trying to control the situation with the physical/mental(Ego) self.

As if to re-enforce his message, Baba had me see  some beautiful videos of the Japan researcher Dr Masaru Emoto on the power of thoughts on water. Being completely in awe of what I saw,  I resolved to be very cautious about my thoughts and words. Then came my tests which i failed miserably. While the gift of awareness has been an extraordinary blessing, the process of changing and constantly witnessing thought patterns has been excruciatingly painful. It is also quite shocking to be aware of so much of mental garbage that your mind processes without you even being aware of it, untill Baba asked me to observe myself very keenly!

June 6th Panchami: Tests and Blessings:  My son was constantly troubling me by not eating. After spending 45 mins with him and begging him to not smack the food spoon on my face repeatedly a few times i lost my calm and hit him. My boy didnt cry though he was hurt and and eventually finished his meal. I was so ashamed of myself for succumbing to a little child’s play and stooping to the level of losing my anger and hitting him. You cannot imagine.. this has to be experienced. When you are completely aware that it is a test from the Divine and know very well that your SatGuru is observing you and yet you miserably fail - not learning from the experience, you wish you did not exist! I wished the earth would consume me out of sheer shame for not passing my lessons in evolution. I profusely apologized to him and begged for Baba’s pardon, being completely aware that i had miserably failed in His test of patience and love.  

The test was not done:  I failed yet again, this time with my husband. I got very upset over an argument with my husband and stooped down to some harsh words. There was a part of me wallowing in self pity and another in anger for failing the test of ‘good thoughts again’, and even though i was Surrendering my miserable state to Baba, there was a part of me that didnt want to let go of the nasty experience. I struggled to get over it and make amends with my husband immediately. I prayed to Baba again, accepting that I once again failed his test. This time i felt very torn - part of me said - ‘ this was not you - you were merely the witness’, yet another part didnt want to ‘Let Go’ of the self pity confirming that it was my experience. I read my son some stories and we retired to bed.

Baba spoke to me. He said - ‘ You often come to me saying you want to serve humanity. You cannot even serve the ones you Love the most? How are you going to serve my children?’ I was very ashamed and my Soul begged pardon. Baba continued to say that He had given me this experience to continue my journey in detached - attachment. That i should not expect anything or depend on anyone for my happiness. My spiritual journey was mine own and I need to accept it. At this point I was not sure whether I was sleeping or awake because i saw various forms - that of ‘Baba’, perhaps ‘Ganesha’, ‘Devi’. Several forms of light going in and out of my conscience, it felt very angelic and peaceful. I heard the word ‘Jagan Mogana’ several times. I ignored it thinking it was yet another phrase from my conscience. But i was alerted and given a few lines for a song. I couldnt tell whether it was for Ganesha or Krishna.

My beloved Krishna

As the song started to flow i realized it was for Krishna

Jagan Mohana Nayaka

Ramaniya Pathra

Nannu koola nandhana

Parandhaama Parama athama

Pasupathe Sitapathey

Rukumani Vallabha athma

I heard Krishna tell me - Why yearn for Human Love, Mother? Love me with all your heart and I will be with you forever’, another song began to unfold for Krishna. It was given to me a few times, even though i didnt right it down at that time, it came back quickly the next day in the afternoon and I wrote it down.

Vaa vaa vilayadalam vaa

vennaiyum thairum thedalaam vaa

Kanaam puchi aadalaam vaa

Gopikalai cheendalaam vaa

Yamuna atril kuzal koovalaam vaa

Yashodhai idam konjalam vaa

vilayadalam vaa vaa

I felt like Krishna was taking my hand and going someplace and I let go of myself. His innocent love was  was so strong I  was carried away by the experience - couldnt write the poem.  I hugged my son and I immediately fell asleep. I kept asking ‘Who am I, Why am I here’ of Amaravati whom I heard from my conscience a few times. I believe Amaravati is an aspect of me - perhaps a guiding Angel or the name of my pure conscience? I am not sure, however i feel a strong connection to this name.

Offering Puja to the Sri Chakra In my dream i saw some visions. In this vision i saw my mother who was the owner of a home, while I was a little working servant child who came to clean Her house as well. She was not happy with me because i was late and was asking me what kept me so long? I told Her that i was cleaning my hands, my feet so that I can offer Kumkum archana for the Sri chakra in the next house where I was a maid as well. She had one too, but the whole room where she kept it was very messy. I was busy doing Puja thats why my hands were red and I was late. This dream was an interesting experience because that day in the morning when I applied Kumkum, Ambal told me that it had been a while since i did abishekam for Her and that I should do it  the next day a Tuesday auspicious for Her.

Close resemblance to photo in Experience

Beloved Mother Varahi creating Bliss in my Heart: Then there was some noise and around 5.30 we were all woken up. I saw my husband and my mind was returned to the scene from yesterday and I realized that my physical being was still upset. As I struggled to let go of the prior nights experience,  I woke with the thought ‘ Who am I, why am I here Amaravati?’ and continued to ask this question again and again. We all went quickly back to sleep for a few more minutes. This time I had a very vivid experience. In my experience, I was in my home with my mother and father. My husband was talking about our home being an expensive investment. I was telling my mother, I just wanted to leave. I wanted to go away from this place because I was unhappy. I was headed North, I cant tell clearly. My mother said that my father was headed South since he was not happy either. In my experience i owned a photo frame. This frame had a picture of the Goddess that I wanted to take with me. However in all the packing to vacate the house, this picture as I noticed had developed a hole in it to the top left, facing me. It was a picture with brown, gray, silver overtones, surely housing the picture of a Devi - I couldnt tell who this Devi was. Then I quickly turned around to ask my mother who had caused this damage to the picture and was transported to a different scene.

                                        Images closely resembling my vision

Image from www.Varahibangalore.org - Mother lives in Sri Balaram's Home

Varahi - Tanjore Periya Kovil

In this scene, there was a  picture of a Goddess - she was hung against a wall which appeared to have a mirror or a cupboard standing against it. The Goddess had  silver adorning Her. I cannot remember whether it was just Her face or Her whole form. Her Face had black /brown /silver overtones.  I was told that she was Varahi. This is the 2nd time i am seeing Varahi in my dreams while I am not a ardent follower of this beautiful Goddess.  There was a man - he was chubby, wheatish complexion, curly hair, stout, in his late 40ies.. He chanted some mantra and this picture transported herself into an exquisite damsel. 

She was slender, tall, probably dressed in a red saree..in her early 40ies.. she was very fair, blemish-less complexion and skin,, she had a large kumkum on her forehead. She had a human form. However every-time i saw the picture and then saw Her, there was merge - like the picture merged into Her human form reassuring me that it was Varahi’s human form. I was dumb founded. He was applying kumkum on her face, neck, feet, arms and was in Bliss giving Her worship in Human form. She was accepting it. Then suddenly she took the form of this man for a brief few seconds as well. This man told me that this has been his experience for the past 25 years! That every-time he worshiped this picture, Mother came in human form to accept his worship. I told him i thought he was doing the detailed Navavarana Puja with Sri Kramam, Lalita Kramam, Navavarnam & Pancha upachara puja.. but really He was expereincing Bliss, having direct contact with Divine Mother just being in Her presence!

The man told me that She was Varahi from Kedarnath. After I woke up, and did some research on Google, I was able to confirm that there is actually a Varahi temple in Kedar-Badri Nath area! What a beautiful gift from my conscience! Here again is a connection with Krishna. 

Ukhimath Temple - courtesy - JaiKedar.blogspot.com

The Ukhimath temple in Kedar-Badri area has its main deity as Usha & Anirudh(grandson of Krishna). There is a sanctum of Goddess Varahi here.
"It is beleived that the Wedding of Usha (Daughter of Vanasur) and Anirudh (Grandson of Lord Krishna) was solemnized here. By name of Usha this place was named as Ushamath, now known as Ukhimath. King Mandhata penances Lord Shiva here. During winter the Utsav Doli of Lord Kedarnath is brought from Kedarnath to this place. Winter puja of Lord Kedarnath and year round puja of Lord Omkareshwar is performed here. This temple is situated at Ukhimath which is at a distance of 41 km from Rudraprayag." Source: http://www.badarikedar.org/content-kedar.aspx?id=52

I know I am somehow strongly related to the child god Krishna. Recently it appears that almost every experience has some remote connection with this beautiful child in my life.

Then something even more peculiar happened. Varahi spread our her feet stretching in opposite direction almost being flat to the ground and offered ‘Namaskaram’ to me, bowing Her whole body and hands to me. I was horrified, mortified that a mere mortal should get a namaskaram from the Devi!  I screamed ‘ what are you doing?’, ‘Amma You are the Devi, not me’. Then I did the same posture and remembered making my feet extend to touch her 2 feet and bowed down to Her. I cannot remember whether I applied vermilion to Her feet or She did to mine. I was just in awe of Her beautiful form and couldnt take my eyes off Her.

Then another woman came to the same room. She was chubby, looked poor, was wearing an old saree, spectacles, curly hair. She was with her husband. They were both in their early 50ies perhaps? Varahi summoned this woman to come close to Her(Goddess) to receive Puja for Her feet. The lady asked who are you? And Varahi said 'I am a shakti of ‘Devi’. Instead of being appalled like me, this lady said - ‘Yes I am ready.. i have been doing Lakshmi Puja all my life’. Then my vision disappeared, however the miracle continued...

I was filled with exuberant love in my heart center. I was told that I need to treat everyone like the Mother, I experienced in my vision. That I was the Goddess and need to just allow the energy of the Divine - filled with compassion, love and peace flow through me! There was so much love, joy and just Bliss, all I wanted to do was hug everyone and share this energy. The negative experience from the prior night was completely wiped out. No trace of any remorse, regret, frustration self pity or hurt remained in my being. I was shocked. Just completely shocked!. If my ego had to rid of this experience it would take a lot of effort to wipe the hurt out, however with Divine Experience, i received complete healing. I apologised several times with my husband for my harsh words and thoughts.  Its unbelievable. I cant explain it in words. The transformation from a petty ego to an expansive consciousness has to be experienced: even if momentary, the experience is extraordinary! Making one wonder the constant state of Mother consciousness that our Gurus must be experiencing and the immense blessings we have availed to be associated with them! Words, feelings, images do no justice. You become a clean slate, devoid of negative impressions, ready to just serve as a receiver and transmitter of Divine Will. Its extra-ordinary. The power of Mantra Japam and the love of a Motherly Guru has to be experienced, it cannot be explained!  To know that this experience occured on Panchami - the day auspicious for Varahi was no simple co-incidence!


The next day, my conscience kept chanting the line from Lalita Sahasranama without any effort on my part the whole day - Bala Vikrama Nandita, Varahi Virya Nandita. It was like my Deiva Guru from the Sri Vidya lineage - child goddess Bala Tripurasundari.. constantly re-assuring me that She was the one who gave me this experience of Varahi and it was not my imagination. Ashada Navarathri or Varahi Navarthri is around the corner (as I learned after this experience) in early July. Guru and Devi willing, I will be able to offer my love and service to Her during this auspicious time.

There were several domestic challenges at home that night and I couldnt do abishekam for the Sri Chakra, even though I have been thinking about it the whole day. Mother Varahi is to be worshiped after sunset and before dawn. While it didnt materialize in physical form, the intent to do worship was very strong. As I was putting my son to sleep, I mentally performed the abhisekam for the Sri chakra with vermilion, sandal, turmeric, milk, honey, curd and offered my love and devotion to the Divine Mother Varahi. After this,  I kept opening my eyes a few times. Every time  i opened my eyes, I saw a small black circle/patch almost like a spider’s large web disappear within a few seconds near my (Ajna) third eye center.  This happened at-least 4 times to my knowledge and i went into deep sleep soon after.  

Sri Balaram doing Puja for Ambal Varahi at his residence. I saw this room in my vision

All knowing Consciousness tallies Experience/Vision with Real Life: I was constantly given the message to create a new post and share these experiences immediately, it was a busy day and I kept putting it off. Interestingly that morning my mother called to say that She has been very depressed the whole week due to my grandmother's death ceremonies and needed a Pranic Healing. It was almost like the dream from the prior night confirmed that I was going to clean my mother's house as a servant -  which perhaps had symbolic meaning of 'cleaning her negative emotions with prayer'. I prayed for Her intently that afternoon and checked with her later. I was happy to know that she felt much better after the prayer. I had decided that I was going to consolidate all the events and make one large entry by end of month. Mother was gently reminding me that this was Her work and I had no decision in it. Whether it be the experiences I document or the pictures I add to the blog, She is the Director and I am merely the scribe. There was a very strong urge to do this and so around 11.30 PM i started to search for nice pictures of Varahi to add to the post. My search the prior day did not yield favorable results to find a image that closely resembled my vision. I had found a couple pictures, but hadnt nailed on the exact ones yet!  I settled for a few nice pictures, but one of them caught my attention. It was not a picture of Varahi, but a room in which a man was doing puja for a goddess. I couldnt tell who the Goddess was. This room seemed very familiar to me. It strongly resembled the room where I saw the vision of the man doing puja to Varahi. This gets even more interesting..

The picture landed me on a page called www.varahibangalore.org. The picture of the main deity being worshiped tallied very well with my dream and so did the room where the worship was offered. The person doing the Puja was a close resemblance. I couldnt see his face very well.. but his physique matched well with the vision. I couldnt complete the post. I was just completely awe struck by the miracle and was reading quite a bit on this website.  As Guruji says, there are no co-incidences, everything has the hand of God.. i read on this website that Varahi is also worshiped as Ekavira. There was an Ekavira temple in the town of Amaravati. I am not sure if it has any connection at all, however i couldnt believe that there was even a correlation with the name! I recieved a very strong message to reach out to my guruji and understand how to worship Divine Mother Varahi. 

Goddess Varahi is the commander in chief of Goddess LalitaTripuraSundari.  According to Guruji, Sri Vidya Upasana is incomplete without the worship of Varahi. She takes the form of a boar to remove the deep seated negative energies (Karma, thoughts, actions, desires, feelings) from our being, allowing Divinity to permeate our consciousness deeper and deeper, so we may realize our true nature - Divine Consciousness.  


You can learn more about Her through these sources
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varahi
http://shaktisadhana.50megs.com/Newhomepage/shakti/varahi.html
http://www.varahibangalore.org/varahi_information.html
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/religious-places-and-spiritual-people/4716-photos-of-deities-75.html
http://www.ammas.com/ar/home.cfm?r=va&qid=160109&bid=0&topicid=941

http://www.ammas.com/ar/home.cfm?r=va&qid=182727&bid=0&topicid=941

http://www.scribd.com/doc/17737237/Varahi-Vijayam-Spirutal-Astrology-magazine-Saktha-Shri-Varahi-Manikanda-Swamigal-Coimbatore-

http://www.scribd.com/doc/18794512/Saktha-Shri-Varahi-manikanda-swamigals-Varahi-vijyam-spritual-magazine

Mother gave me a very strong intent to add the Khadgamala Stotra Video - a very powerful yet simple slogam for Sri Chakra puja, from Devipuram, the land of my beloved Divine Mother Sahasrakshi and Guruji Sri Karuna & Srilasri Amritananda Natha Saraswati. She is worshiped as the Ashta Matrukas in the Sri Chakra and this is video depicts all the Shaktis of the Sri Chakra in Divine form.

Worshiping Sri Varahi in the Sri Chakra
We can listen to Her sahasranama on Raaga through this link below

• http://www.raaga.com/player4/?id=67641&mode=100&rand=0.8451356816377189
• http://www.raaga.com/player4/?id=67642&mode=100&rand=0.7201287114668062 

It is best to get Her mantra from a devoted Guru, Some slokas for Ambal Varahi are listed here
http://www.varahibangalore.org/varahisahasranamam.html
http://www.varahibangalore.org/varahiashtottaram.html
http://www.varahibangalore.org/varahisiddiarchanai.html
http://www.hindupedia.com/tst/Varahi_anugrahashtam




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Divine Mother Kalarathri - 7th aspect of Durga - Image courtesy - Exotic India Art
The Light I saw through out the night resembled Kalarathri's skin color -
A purple - blue hue. It took many forms.. however i cannot recollect any
specific form from my experience. 

June 8th:  Divine Mother Kalarathri Unlocking my conscience: That night as I retired to bed, I kept giving thanks and begged Mother to please let me know how I could serve Her? How I could please Her for this extra-ordinary blessings of vision and experience? I believe I was woken up to see a black form at night and was quite petrified. Mother probably realized i was not ready for this experience. I kept going in and out of consciousness. I saw a glass made of ice filling with water on my deck and then hot water burning on my stove. I could feel the heat and cold - but nothing hurt me. Someone was pushing my lips up and down like they were brushing the outside of my mouth. It felt like there was a Divine attempt to cleanse the words spoken by my being. One part of me was attempting to wake up and see who was with me, while another was lulling me into sleep. I saw lot of violet light that night and was woken up a few times with jerks at my heart center, only to be filled with even more violet light. I couldnt tell if I was asleep or awake with the light. It felt that I was awake, but have a very hazy memory of my experience. I was in some kind of dark land. We were solving a circular puzzle with 4 parts. This puzzle was actually problems of people. I solved many of them. The first part was usually a question/problem. The 2nd part was a solution. Part 3 were obstacles to realize the solution and Part 4 was deploying the solution to the problem. I remember Mother telling me that I need to listen more often than speak.. but nothing more. There were 2 men guiding me through this whole locking/unlocking experience. It appeared to me they were high tech magicians.. using super computers to control everything. One of these men was much older than the other. They were both protecting me and guiding me through the experience, assuring me everything was in their control. I felt like they were my Gurus. I was doing very odd things.. flying, converting into small form.. experiencing great fear from some forces chasing me - these forces were trying hard to prevent me from unlocking the solution. I was trying to grab or pass on a magic stick which was the key. It was really like i was in a thriller movie.. only couldnt remember it scene by scene. There was so much of darkness during the whole experience, it was very eerie. Just before I woke up, I was told that it was Mother Kalarathri, an aspect of Durga was with me through out the night! Durga/Kali are my favorite icons of Mother, however I am no particular follower of Goddess Kalarathri. Infact I am scared of Her disheveled form. To know that She blessed me through the night was another unexplainable blessed experience! I woke up the next morning feeling like i didnt get a wink of sleep, however I couldnt recollect clearly many of my experiences from the prior night. It felt like there was Divine Presence, protection and guidance through out the night with me.

Here is a summary of Kalaratri from exotic India
A form of mother, Kalaratri is extremely frightening to look at but she is always auspicious in effect. This is why she is otherwise known as Subhankari (doing good). So the devotees need not feel any fear from her.
On the seventh day of Navaratra the worship of Kalaratri form is prescribed by the scriptures. This day the mind of the striver reaches Sahasrara Cakra. For such a striver the door of all Siddhis of the universe start opening. This day the Sadhaka with all his faculties is identified with the mother Kalaratri. As a result of her direct vision the devotee becomes quite fit to earn all sorts of virtues. All his sins and obstacles in his way are completely destroyed. He attains the abodes which are the fruit of inexhaustible virtues.
The mother, Kalaratri destroys the wicked. Danava, Daitya, Raksasa, Bhuta, Preta and all other evil spirits are terrified and run away as soon as the devotee remembers Kalaratri. She is also the remover of planetary evil effects. Her worshipper has no fear from fire, water, wild beings, enemy or night. By her grace he always remains unmindful of any fear.

Sri Muthuvaduganatha Swamigal Siddhar

A Siddhar associated with Varahi: After writing my artcile, I tried to do some research on Varahi and landed myself on the webpage of a place near Madurai dedicated to Sri Muthuvaduganatha Swamigal Siddhar. He is believed to be an avatara of Mother Varahi and attained Jiva Samadhi at 96 years of age. Story has it that  Several years after his Jiva Samadhi, when a large temple was being constructed to house the Moola Sthan / Jiva Samadhi, a small portion of the Samadhi was noticed to be slightly damaged.
A young girl who happened to pass by the Samadhi got a glimpse of our Siddhar whose body had become of Divine Golden Colour, with his long hair extending to the ground and the garland of mogra flowers fresh on his neck for over 108 years. He has not only himself attained eternal life but also conferred the same benediction on the garland of mogra flowers which was fresh and emitting fragrance as well as the Ghee lamp and Agarbatti, incence sticks !
What intrigued me was that this Siddhar was born as a child in a royal family and after the death of his father, his mother fled the kingdom in the fear of persecution of his son. They were 'discriminated and banned from their own kingdom' due to the greed of their relatives. It is interesting since these are words(discriminated, banned) I heard when I contacted the spirit  of Siddhar, asking for their experience with Divine Mother in the path of Self Realization. Was this the story I couldnt re-collect from my dialogue when I woke up the next morning ? I will never know. But i felt blessed that I was able to learn about the life of a holy soul who lives and blesses the world from his Samadhi even today!
One can visit this place through their website - http://www.supremesiddhar.org/index.html

 Sri Muthuvaduganatha Swamigal Siddhar receiving Abishekam at his shrine near Madurai

SatGuru Gnanananda Giri - Seeing him in my
vision few times for the past months

Panduranga Vittale: I saw some songs one night. It was on a white sheet of paper with blue lines. The words were short and started to sing. However i was not able to wake my physical body up to make a copy. I could not compose it.
Yet another day, I had done some heavy duty gardening re-potting my tulsi saplings and peppers, the prior day and my legs were in pain hell, hip down. To make matters worse the iron supplements I took recently created incredible nausea, leaving me in a very uncomfortable situation. My son was being his usual spirited self that day and wouldnt let go of me. I couldnt eat very much and the pain in my legs had gotten so out of control that I started to cry out of sheer inadequacy. I started to hear anklets again. I check with my husband and he said he couldnt hear anything. My son and husband struggled hard to cope with the situation, so my sister gave me some massage and heat packs and tried to soothe me. Suffering in pain,  As i was just asking Mother to give me strength to go through this excruciating pain, my conscience had already transported into depths I couldnt explain. I saw a holy man just looking at me with deep concern. I have seen him before - As i was trying to recognize him as Gynananda Giri - i started to hear 'Panduranga Vittale Harinarayana' from my conscience. I have not heard this song in the recent past, actually i have not heard this song before!. I dont know anything of this song beyond these words. I couldnt believe I was given a song when I was feeling so sick. I couldnt wake up to write it and quickly fell asleep. It was a special blessing. I started to get experiences with this great Satguru Gnanannda Giri after the song of Krishna was given to me in a vision. This is perhaps the 3rd or 4th time i had an auspicious vision of this holy saint. A quick search for this song, the next morning landed me on a Sai Bhajan in Youtube! My sister did some Pranic Healing for me. The next morning I was 90% healed and back to my normal routine.  Tests and miracles are abound in the Eternal Garden of our master, all one needs to do, to avail of Grace, is the humble act of complete Surrender.

Panduranga Vittale Harinarayana - Sai Bhajan

Ganesha Mantra with several Healing properties from Guruji: "Aum Sreem Hreem Kleem Glaum Gam Ganapataye Vara Varada Sarvajana Me Vashamaanaya Svaahaa Tarpayaami namaha"

One of my favorite paintings of Ganesha - by Choosak Vissanukamron an artist from Thailand

My Loving Ganesha:As I was about to fall asleep one night i saw a beautiful image of Ganesha. This image was formed with several small black ants. Within a few brief seconds of this image formation, i felt a jerk at my heart center and immediately saw the whole image burst into pieces and the ants just falling out and dissap pear. Then I saw another multi colored almost like a rainbow colored Ganesha take form in front of my eyes and dissappear shortly as well. I love my Balachandra at home, incidentally the next morning I was in a big rush and didnt get an opportunity to pay my obeisance to him. As I was just about a few yards away from home, going where ever I needed to, He reminded me of this dream the prior night and how I had not kept my ritual with him that morning. I have this ritual of imagining that Ganesha(Balachandra whom I painted a couple years ago in my home) is my son , I normally give him a huge squeeze and kiss his cheeks and feet and tell him  ‘ I love you so much my koshku - moshku ( meaning chubby and delicious!) baby Ganesha’..everyday in the morning when i walk into my hallway to start my day, cause thats where he is stationed!

Shiva Shakti - My dream had them filled with Sanskrit alphabets and facing the other direction

 

Narasimhar w/ Lakshmi

Lakshmi & Shiva Shakti:  Yet another night i had visions of several gods. I was in what appeared to be a Vaishanvite temple and kept hearing the word Narasimha very often. These deities were either taking their turn for a parade outside the temple or where  each receiving a bath and alankaram. Just to re-in-force my dream, i remember going to a huge educational institution and was waiting for a women I haven't even met before called ‘Lakshmi’.  I woke up feeling like I was awake the whole night watching the proceedings at a temple that I had no memory of, except for seeing several beautiful decked Gods & Goddesses. Late the following morning, I decided to do Yoga Nidra.

This mostly leads to some interesting experiences every time i indulge in some Yoga Nidra. I was asking for blessings for some of the projects that I was working on and soon after kept repeating the thoughts - ‘Who am I and Why am I here?’  I saw myself as a small child, opening the door to a woman who was even taller than the door itself. She was wearing a beautiful white saree and as I opened the door, She merged into me. I had many more thoughts that I couldnt recover when I woke up, however this was was very distinct in my mind. A few seconds before i woke up, I saw a very beautiful picture - again white in color of what appeared to be Shiva-Shakti - both sitting together, with thier sides turned to my left - i guess looking West?  However they were also completely White and there were several sanskrit alphabets covering every aspect of their form. My Yoga Nidra cd stopped playing and I woke up with these thoughts. The first thought with the white lady was - gosh.. did i see a ghost? I mean what happened? Then I told myself, well since She was wearing White, it could have been Goddess Saraswati. I was very happy to have seen Divine Mother and Shiva in various forms. As I sat down to do some work, I was prompted to go and listen to some Lakshmi related songs on Youtube. I had recieved several songs on the http://www.ahobilavalli.org/ website that were in words and I have not been lucky to find a CD or Youtube video of these except for the Sri Stuthi... So I decided to listen to the Sri Stuthi again. 

Sri Stuthi - a beautiful song on MahaLakshmi

As I was listening, I was prompted to click on another video of what appeared to be a song for ‘Padmavati Thayar’, so I decided to listen to it. I was just mesmerised by the beautiful song, however more importantly, I saw Goddess Laksmi dressed in a White saree, receving Pal, thair abhishekam, making Her look completely White, just as I had encountered in my experience a few minutes ago! Totally shocked and overwhelmed by gratitude for a dream the prior night and a vision the next morning that converted itself to a tangible song and form of Divine Mother, that I can share with the world! What an extraordinary gift! She has been asking me repeatedly to share this Bliss with everyone! I have also been reminded to create some recitation vidoes of the beautiful songs She found me last year before Varalakshmi Puja. Her grace willing, this will happen soon.

Ksheerabdhi kanyakaku, a song dedicated to Maha Lakshmi (alamelu manga) composed by sage annamacharya, sung by MS Subbalakshmi

Sri Gurubhyo Namaha!